"God had to bring Abraham to the end of his own strength, and to let him see that in his own body he could do nothing. He had to consider his own body as good as dead, and then take God for the whole work; and when he looked away from himself, and trusted God alone, then he became fully persuaded that what He had promised, he was able to perform. That is what God is teaching us, and He has to keep away encouraging results until we learn to trust without them, and then He loves to make His Word real in fact as well as faith." A.B. Simpson
Did you ever really stop to consider the fact that gold, and other precious metals or gems, are not pure in their natural state? They've been created with dross, impurities, rough edges.
God is always good. His ways are so far above our own! And to think that He already has a plan for every problem, pain, sorrow, and trouble to show His magnificence and make us more like Himself. It truly is a wonder. (2 Cor. 4:16-18, 9:8, 1 Peter 1:6-9, James 1:2-4)
“He shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” Malachi 3:3
"Our Father, who seeks to perfect His saints in holiness, knows the value of the refiner’s fire. It is with the most precious metals that the assayer takes the most pains and subjects them to the hot fire, because such fires melt the metal, and only the molten mass releases its alloy or takes perfectly the new form in the mould. The old refiner never leaves his crucible, but sits down by it, lest there should be one excessive degree of heat to mar the metal. But as soon as he skims from the surface the last of the dross, and sees his own face reflected, he puts out the fire." Arthur T. Pierson
"And He watched the dross that we had not seen,
And it melted and passed away.
And the gold grew brighter and yet more bright,
But our eyes were so dim with tears,
We saw the fire — not the Master’s hand,
And questioned with anxious fears.
Yet our gold shone out with a richer glow,
As it mirrored a Form above,
That bent o’er the fire, tho’ unseen by us
With a look of ineffable love.
Can we think that it pleases His loving heart
To cause us a moment’s pain?
Ah, no! but He saw through the present cross
The bliss of eternal gain.
So He waited there with a watchful eye,
With a love that is strong and sure,
And His gold did not suffer a bit more heat,
Than was needed to make it pure."
Good question :) I don't know the particulars nor the reasons of my story much less yours, but what I do know is that we were made with dross in order that we would have to be purified. And this is a beautiful facet of the sovereignty of God, for what He has planned to break, He planned with the remedy to build at the same time.
Do we get to sin more because it'll make us more pure? Ah, no. The purpose of purifying our sinful natures, as believers, is to make us more like our sinless Savior, to love His ways, revel in His beauty, and grow our desire to be as sinless as He, not to grow in what His holiness cannot stand.
Knowing He purifies with every trial, regardless of size or magnitude, changes our view of those trials, doesn't it? The pain will still hurt deeply, achingly. The long, sad days and dark nights will still be so. We may not see a happy resolution, or be granted our request, but we can be at peace that He is completely trustworthy and whether good or ill, as Hudson Taylor said "God's work done in God's way will never lack God's supply.”
The refining continues for as long as we live and He is with us always, showing us the way to go, carrying us in hard times. His peace passes understanding.
Someday, it will all be clear, and right now we can rejoice that He works all things for His glory and the good of those whose hearts He has changed to love Him.